


Stop Tomorrow From Stealing All My Time

by Jac_Danvers



Category: Lost
Genre: But not a major character, Character Death, F/M, Family, candidates, season 6
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-21
Updated: 2014-12-21
Packaged: 2018-03-02 14:19:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2815127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jac_Danvers/pseuds/Jac_Danvers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Illana's death reminds Sun of the severity of the Island's whims. She may have lost her free will, but that doesn't mean she can't fight.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stop Tomorrow From Stealing All My Time

**Author's Note:**

> Lost is not mine!

"Hugo, I'm looking out for your best interests," Illana huffed loudly, the tinge of desperation in her voice drawing Sun's attention away from the notebook in her lap. Alongside the margins, she doodled Ji Yeon's name, embellishments decorating each character on the page. It was a waiting game again- always a waiting game- as the others made preparations to return to Ajira 316 and blow up the plane.

Thoughts on the plan? Not like she could voice them. She felt utterly useless since the Man in Black swooped in and stole her English. And really, had anyone _ever_ really taken her opinion into consideration when it came to plans of action? If they'd bothered to ask, she would have written that blowing up their only means of returning home was absolutely insane.

What good was surviving if she couldn't return home with the man she loved and introduce him to their perfect baby daughter?

Across the beach, the curly haired woman was throwing water bottles into her bag, the frustration evident on her face. Sun could empathize, though her problems were of entirely different origin. There was still neither hide nor hair of Jin, she was utterly incapable of speaking, and her beautiful, sweet little girl was now without both parents.

You wanted frustration? That was frustration.

"And God help us if it ever leaves this island," Illana continued, duffle bag swinging on her arm, bouncing against her hip. As Sun watched, Hurley stepped backwards with his hands up, cringing. Next to him, Richard's eyes had widened, jaw agape. Momentarily, she wondered why Illana's actions warranted such a reaction.

Then it dawned on her.

She _couldn't_ be carrying the dynamite. She wouldn't be that—

Sun didn't hear the final words that escaped Illana's lips as she dropped the faded pack to the ground. There was a perfect moment of silence, the messenger bag seeming to hover just centimeters off the ground, taunting them. She was far enough, safe from the imminent blast, but she moved on instinct. Pushing herself up, Sun stumbled toward the water, her feet sinking heavily into the sand as she struggled to increase the distance between herself and Illana as she waited for the inevitable. And despite knowing no words would emerge, she attempted to scream a warning- anything that might protect the people that had become the constants in her life.

A breathe later, the bright island sun was outshone by a single supernova of dynamite and flesh. The roar of the blast deafened her, and the smoke bore down, blinding her from the gust of particulates that were blown into her face by the impact of the explosion. Wiping her face on the back of her hand, she saw sand, speckled red. It didn't immediately dawn on her what exactly the redness was from, but when she realized, she thought she was going to lose her lunch.

She made a conscious decision not to think about it anymore.

OOO

In the immediate aftermath of Illana's death, there was a shocked silence that overtook the camp- an elephant in the room that no one wished to acknowledge. Sun knew, personally, she was ignoring the implications of the curly haired woman's death. She needed a clear mind if she was going to focus on her mission- finding Jin. So despite her instincts, despite everything that told her to stick to the beaches, and not tag along with the group that was searching for more dynamite (because two people blown up by the centuries old explosives was _clearly_ not enough), she followed them into the jungle. Once again trekking through the tangled, warped trees in a single file line, no thought to the noise they might make, that just screamed " _please attack us, we're perfect targets._ "

No, she wouldn't admit it to herself. Refused to think of anything but Jin and Ji Yeon, and home in Korea, or America, or wherever they might find safe refuge and finally be at peace.

Until Ben said it aloud.

He spoke softly to Jack as they walked in front of her, muttering really. Whatever the conversation, they had not wanted her to overhear. Ben sounded unsure, almost worried- two words Sun would never have associated with the bespectacled man before this moment.

"No sooner does she tell you who you are then she blows up. The Island was done with her. Makes me wonder what's gonna happen when it's done with us…"

Done with us.

Done. With us.

They could only avoid the reality of the situation for so long. Because she'd known from the start that returning to the island could very well be a suicide mission. That when she'd kissed her daughter goodbye and left her in the care of her mother, it could have been their last goodbye. That by the time she found Jin, he could be six feet under the sand with a makeshift cross marking the spot—if he was that lucky.

She'd always known. But sweet denial had a way of sugar coating the bitter taste of truth.

Had they been foolish to think the Island had ever truly let them leave? Between mourning for her dead husband and raising her daughter, life had returned to an almost quasi-normalcy in the months after the Oceanic 6 arrived in California. A few well spun lies protected her and Ji Yeon from any questions on the devastating fate of her husband. A few well spun lies, and they returned to relative anonymity.

They'd all been fools.

Because in the end, their fates were nothing if not intrinsically tied to the Island. They were Candidates, and because of that, free will meant nothing. The decision between life and death was tied to the mysterious whim of the Island that was once their savior in the face of disaster. And she could fall to her knees, beg for their lives, beg on behalf of their daughter- it wouldn't be swayed.

Perhaps she should be grateful, that the Island had even allowed her to leave and bring Ji Yeon into a world where she _would_ be free.

_ What is going to happen when it's done with us? _

Sun didn't know when the Island would be done with her. She didn't know when- or if- the Island was done with Jin. But she did know that, despite what the Island and Jacob thought, she still had a modicum of free will yet. The will to fight.

And fight she would.

She would fight for Jin- to find him, to hold him in her arms, to tell him what she never told him enough when they were together. She would fight for Ji Yeon- to return to her, to raise her the way she planned, with her mother's independence and her father's courage. She would fight for her family- for father and daughter who never met, and mother who loved them both.

Sun Hwa Kwan would fight for love.

Because even when the Island was done with her and Jin, love would live on in the little girl they created. And nothing- Island or man- could take that away from her.

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally written for LosinLost18's Scene it Challenge for the episode Everybody Hates Hugo on Fanfiction.net, and won! If I remember correctly (and its been a few years) the challenge was to take an episode and rewrite a scene from the perspective of a non-flashback character. Sun has always been a challenge for me to write, but when I was given this episode, I knew I had to focus on her. She's probably in her hardest place during early season 6, unable to communicate, searching for her husband, separated from her daughter. But she's also at her strongest in these episodes. Sun and Jin have always been a challenge for me, and any excuse to toss in some Illana love is always awesome. Reviews and constructive criticism are always appreciated!


End file.
